Tag Archive | motherhood

Ode to the Hug

Had a lot of talk about hugs yesterday.  Today’s blog is an ode to the calming, nurturing, and comforting nature of a simple hug.  It can communicate and change people.  Just a simple hug, but it can be so powerful.  Was prompted to hug a child a while back and learned something I would not have known otherwise.  Was reminded to hug another child as well, multiple times.  Was reminded that even teenage boys need hugs.  What is your favorite hug story?


Near Misses

As a parent, I sometimes wonder how often our children are preserved from harm without our even realizing or acknowledging it.

Yesterday my 5 year old swallowed a hard candy and actually started choking on it.  I must admit I panicked a little bit as he had his hands up near his throat, started jerking, and I heard a faint “I’m choking.”  I knew enough to understand that if he could say anything he wasn’t completely out of air, but I also knew that this kid wouldn’t whisper the word “choking” just for fun.  I didn’t want to use any drastic measures if he could still get some air in, but he had a look of sheer terror on his face and was definitely having some difficulty breathing.  Fortunately his gag reflex was alive and well and he also looked like he was trying to throw up.  I brought him over to the sink and told him to go ahead and try to throw up.  He started to turn pale, then suddenly out popped a life saver candy he had stolen from his sister.  Thank goodness for gag reflexes!  I suspect that for a while he was only breathing through the hole in the middle of the candy, which was also a blessing.  First thing he said is “I won’t do that again!”

I was a little extra on edge because I had just heard about a local 10 year old who had a peanut allergy, and had accidentally eaten something with peanut oil in it.  The parents had to make the decision to take him off of life support and he had not made it.  One day he was running in the local track meet, the next day he was gone.  It can be that quick.  I’m so glad it was not my turn to go through that.


The Reach of a Life

I am in mourning this morning as we found out about the passing of the father of one of our son’s friends.  He leaves behind a wife and large family of young children and teens.

This is the second tragedy I have heard about this week.  Neither death was expected, both died of cancer, both left large, young families, and both thought they were fine at Christmas.

I had met this father only once, and the other death, a mother, I only knew the mother-in-law.    Yet both of their passings fill me with compassion and sorrow.  It is amazing the affect each life can have on people they probably never even suspected would notice.  I receive comfort and strength in knowing that there is a plan for them to continue on, and I need more faith that God also has a plan for those they have left behind to also continue on.


Lots of tender mercies this weekend, lots of family.

One of the daily miracles I don’t often thank God for, is time.  There never seems to be enough.  Just made arrangements to add 3 extra days to my year!  Okay, there aren’t really 3 more days in my year than yours, but 3 days of no work for me, limited work for my husband, and no children to take care of (my full time 24/7 job) for 3 entire days is the best gift I could possibly get for my birthday.  Thanks Mom!

What will I do with 3 entire days — absolutely no outside commitments?  Finish a 20 year project, put it online, thousands of dollars of home improvement (without 5 kids slowing me down)  — re-paint the entire house, finish rebuilding the fence, and even put in some new carpet.  Already lining up help to come work on the kitchen for stuff I can’t do.  If the tax return comes by then I have a few more projects I’ll hire out also.  Finish the honey-do’s?  Maybe if I’m good we’ll sneak a date night in as well. 🙂  Then a 4th day goofing off in Vegas.  (Did I mention I have a problem with extreme optimism?)

What would you do with 3 extra days?

Gifts from Father


English: Jesus Christ with children

English: Jesus Christ with children (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


When I had my first child, I realized really quickly that children are simply gifts from God.  Each child is entrusted to me, and the best I can hope for is to not mess them up, but allow them the chance to become what their first Father has in store for them.


In our faith, each baby is given a blessing when they are born.  This blessing is given through the priesthood and basically gives them their name, and a blessing from their Father in Heaven.  Thinking about it, it is sort of like Princess Aurora receiving gifts from the fairies – or whatever they are.  With each of my children, I quickly identified a single word that summed up their unique talents.  My children were joy, comfort, peace, calm, love, compassion, and strength.


Through the years I have been amazed to see how each child, even from young ages, shows each of these unique gifts.  A quick story today is about my youngest, Mr. Strength.  His strength is definitely physical, but it is other things as well.  Yesterday morning this four year old boy opened his eyes, smiled at me, and said something I felt showed real strength of character.  “Mom, I love you.  When I go to preschool I miss you so much.”  It takes a real man to admit when he needs his mother!  Especially this tough little boy who would never show weakness by crying at school.




Instant Cure to Tantrums

I’ve spent the entire week dealing with a six-year-old’s temper tantrums on the way in to school.  Yelling, crying, clinging, sobbing, hiding, etc.  Not wanting to go to school.  Teacher interventions, counselor interventions, nothing worked.  She actually loves school and we couldn’t figure out what was up.

Last night Dad came home from an out of town work trip.  He took her to school.  All better.  Tantrums are over.  I think she missed Dad (and Shanna and Andrew) and it was just a little too much.  One thing I could never be is a single mom.



Motherhood – part 2

"Father gives attention to his newborn da...

Have you ever noticed that when a bunch of ladies get together and start talking about babies, they all want to tell their labor and delivery stories?  It’s sort of crazy, but it makes sense.  Becoming a mother changes a woman, just as becoming a father changes many men.  (Miracle #1)  I thought I’d share my first labor and delivery story today.  It contains many miracles I need to be grateful for.

My first labor I could have died without modern interventions.  After 24 hours of hard labor, painful contractions every 4 – 10 minutes the entire time, I had made ZERO progress at all.  In fact when I had had my check up the day before I was told I probably had 2 weeks still.  I was finally admitted to the hospital, not because they expected me to have a baby, but I was admitted for dehydration and exhaustion.  Thanks to IV’s, epidurals and petosin, (Miracles 2, 3, & 4)  I was able to actually rest, gather strength, and make enough progress after another 12 hours to get the poor kid out.  I don’t know what would have happened without those interventions.  At very least I would have been too exhausted to labor.  People DID used to die in childbirth.

Not only was the labor difficult for me, but for the baby as well.   She ended up in the NBICU (Miracle #5) with a hole in her lung from the excessive stress.  I didn’t know it then, but the doctor and hospital were technically negligent by not providing a c-section before the baby was so stressed.  It worked out well for me because I was able to avoid needing a c-section with any of my future children (Miracle #6).   I am glad they had a NBICU, but she actually healed herself within 24 hours with no help from the doctors.  The human body has an amazing capacity to heal itself, and infants ability to heal is even more astounding (Miracle #7.)  I do credit the sterile environment for speeding the healing with no further complications or infections.

The greatest miracle that day was the birth of my daughter.  (Miracle #8)  Life is something so precious, yet so far beyond our mortal understanding.  The second greatest miracle was the strength and comfort that the Lord gave me as mother of that precious life.  The moment they finally told me that she had been admitted to the NBICU I knew without question that she would be fine.  (Miracle #9) Even seeing her with tubes and needles and monitors did not bother me.  I had complete calm.  I did insist that her father be with her the entire time (which he was) and that she be given a priesthood blessing as soon as possible.

In our religion we believe that we have been given the priesthood authority from Christ that includes the gift of healing.  It requires 2 male priesthood holders with authority to bless them in the name of Christ by the laying on of hands.  It just happened that one of my husband’s good friends who also held the priesthood was one of the technicians working on my baby.  They gave her the blessing and I wouldn’t be surprised if that was when her lung was healed, because they never could even find it after that. (Miracle #10.)

I became very grateful for that experience.  Visiting in the NBICU I saw many babies who were very premature, and who needed a lot of help just to live.  That experience touched me very deeply.  I instantly developed a deep gratitude for my own child’s health.  I will never forget the love I felt for those babies who weren’t even mine.  I didn’t understand why their babies were so fragile and mine was so healthy.  I guess it is not up to us what lot we are given in life.

The final blessing came when Shanna was 2 days old.  She was still in the ICU for observation.  They finally decided that her risk of collapsing a lung had probably passed and allowed her to try to nurse.  She had spent the first 24 hours on an IV to let her lungs heal, then they gradually let her try drinking from a bottle that would feed her easily without the need to work her lungs very hard.  When they finally let her try to nurse they were very worried and told me that it may take several weeks for her to learn to nurse because of her late start.  Miracle #11 – she latched on the very first try and never had a single problem nursing or with her lungs after that point.  Anyone who has struggled with feeding a child knows how fortunate that was.

Motherhood is amazing.